Pardon I figured out my problem. An offus by oneus error.
I was counting the numberCell column as the 0 dataindx. This had me working on a column that was off screen due to the excessive width I was trying to change, so I didn't see the change.
As far as changing width, this now works nicely.
grid.colModel.width = '50%';
refreshCM();
refresh;
I'm also able to get filters to show which was the original problem
Sorry for the goof but maybe it will help some other poor soul.